Cancelling DEI? Then Out With the NFL Draft

The Universal Pattern of Learning

Every skill we master follows the same four-stage pattern. Understanding these stages doesn't just help us learn – it helps us become better teachers and leaders. Let's break it down:

Stage 1: Unconsciously Incompetent

This is where we start: completely unaware of what we don't know. My son watching me drive from the passenger seat thinks it looks easy. Just like I once thought leadership was simply about telling people what to do. In this stage, we don't even know enough to be nervous.

What it sounds like:

• "How hard can it be?"
• "I've watched others do this plenty of times"
• "It's just common sense, right?"

Stage 2: Consciously Incompetent

‍Reality hits. For my son, it's the moment he first sits behind the wheel and realizes he needs to simultaneously:

• Watch all mirrors
• Control the pedals
• Stay in lane
• Monitor speed
• Watch for hazards
• Follow traffic rules

Suddenly, what looked simple becomes overwhelming. This is exactly how I felt in my first leadership role. The sheer number of things to track, decisions to make, and relationships to manage felt paralyzing.

‍This is where most people quit. The gap between where they are and where they need to be feels too vast. The awareness of everything they don't know becomes overwhelming.

Stage 3: Consciously Competent

‍This is the practice phase. Every action requires intense focus and deliberate thought. New drivers white-knuckle the steering wheel, mentally checking every mirror, hyper-aware of every move. New leaders similarly overthink every interaction, decision, and meeting.But here's the good news: with enough practice, patterns emerge. Confidence builds. What once required intense concentration starts to flow more naturally.

Stage 4: Unconsciously Competent

‍Finally, mastery (auto-pilot)! Experienced drivers navigate complex situations without conscious thought. Their mind is free to focus on higher-level decisions because the basics have become automatic.Great leaders reach this same state. They can seamlessly shift from strategic planning to team development to crisis management, all while making it look effortless. But remember – it only looks effortless because of the thousands of hours of practice that came before.And also remember – never stop learning. Don’t assume you’ve got it figured out. 

Breaking Through the Barrier

‍Remember that critical second stage where most people quit? Here's how to push through:

1. Normalize the Overwhelm
   
   • Recognize that feeling overwhelmed is a sign of growth
   • Understand that everyone goes through this phase
   • Use it as a signal that you're actually learning
2. Chunk It Down
   
   • Break the skill into smaller, manageable pieces
   • Focus on mastering one element at a time
   • Celebrate small wins along the way
3. Find a Guide
   
   • Learn from those who've already mastered the skill
   • Seek feedback from experienced mentors
   • Use structured learning programs to fast-track progress

The Leadership Connection

‍Leadership development follows this exact pattern. New leaders often move from:

• Thinking leadership is simple (Stage 1)
• Becoming overwhelmed by its complexity (Stage 2)
• Deliberately practicing new skills (Stage 3)
• Finally leading naturally and effectively (Stage 4)

The key is recognizing where you are in the journey and not getting discouraged in that critical second stage. Remember: feeling overwhelmed isn't a sign that you're failing – it's a sign that you're growing.

Moving Forward

‍Whether you're learning to drive, lead, or master any new skill, understanding these four stages helps you:

• Recognize where you are in the learning journey
• Stay motivated during the challenging phases
• Support others through their own development
• Build more effective learning environments

The path from unconscious incompetence to unconscious competence isn't easy, but it is predictable. And with the right understanding, support, and persistence, it's absolutely achievable.

Have you ever felt like everything in your life burned to ashes, forcing you to rebuild from nothing? That's exactly where I found myself several years ago—staring at the tattoo of a phoenix spreading across my chest, a permanent reminder of my personal cycle of destruction and rebirth.

But in that particular season of rebuilding, something profound happened. I discovered that the most powerful transformation doesn't come from changing your circumstances; it comes from changing how you understand yourself.

The Self-Awareness Delusion

Here's a startling truth: 90% of people believe they're self-aware, but only 10-15% actually are.

This massive gap isn't just interesting—it's dangerous, especially for leaders. When you lack true self-awareness, you're essentially navigating your life and career with a broken compass, convinced you're heading north while actually moving south.

True self-awareness isn't what most people think it is. It's not just acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses or recognizing when you're stressed. It's a much deeper, more nuanced understanding that operates on three distinct levels.

The Phoenix Framework: Three Levels of Self-Awareness

After years of working with executives and building businesses, I've developed what I call the Phoenix Framework—a three-level approach to achieving genuine self-awareness that can transform both your leadership and your life.

Level 1: Data - Knowing Your Behaviors

Most people stop here, mistaking it for complete self-awareness. This level involves recognizing your behavioral patterns:

• How you typically react in meetings
• Your communication style
• Your decision-making approach
• Your habits under pressure

This knowledge is valuable but limited. It tells you what you do, but not why it matters or what drives it.

Think of a leader who recognizes they tend to dominate conversations. They might work on talking less, but without deeper understanding, they'll likely replace one surface behavior with another without addressing the underlying dynamics.

Level 2: Impact - Recognizing Your Effect

This is where self-awareness begins to have real power. Understanding the ripple effects of your behaviors changes everything.

At this level, you recognize:

• How your actions affect others
• The unintended consequences of your communication style
• The organizational impacts of your leadership approach
• The emotional responses you trigger in different situations

When that same leader who dominates conversations understands that their behavior makes team members feel undervalued and less likely to share critical information, they're motivated to change in a way that simple behavioral awareness never could achieve.

Impact awareness transforms leadership because it connects behaviors to consequences. It's the difference between knowing you interrupt people and understanding that your interruptions are silencing the voices you most need to hear.

Level 3: Drives - Uncovering Your Core Motivations

This is the deepest and most transformative level of self-awareness. Here, you understand the innate drives and motivations that fuel your behaviors:

• What are your fundamental needs?
• What gives you energy versus what drains you?
• What hardwired tendencies shape your natural approach?
• What are you unconsciously seeking or avoiding?

Our dominating leader might discover they have a high drive for influence—a natural need to shape outcomes and direct conversations. This insight is powerful because it reveals that their need isn't wrong; it's just being expressed in a counterproductive way.

With an awareness of their drive, they can find healthier ways to satisfy that influence need—perhaps by focusing on asking powerful questions or by channeling their energy into strategic planning sessions where directive input is more valuable.

Why All Three Levels Matter

Each level of the Phoenix Framework builds on the previous one, creating a comprehensive understanding that transforms how you lead and live:

Data alone leads to surface-level behavioral tweaks that rarely stick.

Data + Impact creates meaningful motivation for change but may lead to suppressing natural drives rather than channeling them effectively.

Data + Impact + Drives allows for authentic transformation by helping you satisfy your core needs in ways that create positive rather than negative impact.

Rising From Your Own Ashes

The phoenix doesn't just rebuild itself identically after burning—it emerges as something new and more powerful. True self-awareness works the same way.

When you understand not just your behaviors but their impact and the drives behind them, you don't simply become a "better version" of yourself. You transform into something fundamentally more effective and authentic.

For me, that tattoo across my chest became more than just a symbol of surviving difficult times. It became a daily reminder of the continuous cycle of self-discovery and reinvention that powers genuine growth.

The most profound leadership tool isn't found in business books or management theories. It's found in the mirror—but only when you know how to look beyond the surface to see the complete picture of who you are, how you affect others, and what truly drives you forward.

Are you ready to rise from the ashes of self-unawareness?

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The Resume Relic

Let's face it: resumes are relics. They're snapshots of past experiences and skills, often carefully curated and increasingly unreliable in the age of AI-generated content. Even if we could guarantee their authenticity, two critical questions emerge:

1. Can resumes reliably tell us about a candidate's skills and experience in today's rapidly evolving job market?
2. Are skills and experience even among the top things we should be looking for in a candidate?

The truth is, the resume-centric approach to hiring was never foolproof. It became the standard because, for a long time, it was the best option we had. But in today's dynamic business landscape, it's time to look beyond the paper and focus on factors that truly predict success.

The Top 10 Factors More Important Than Skills & Experience

‍Here are ten factors that might be more predictive of a candidate's success than their listed skills and experience:

1. Hardwiring and Innate Drivers

‍Understanding a person's core motivations and natural tendencies can provide invaluable insights into how they'll perform in a role and within a team. Tools like Aptive Index can help uncover these crucial attributes. These innate characteristics often determine how effectively someone will apply their skills and experience.

2. Adaptability and Learning Agility

‍In a rapidly changing business environment, the ability to adapt quickly and learn new skills is often more valuable than existing knowledge. A candidate who can pivot quickly and absorb new information will outperform one with a static skill set.

3. Culture Fit and Values Alignment

‍How well does a candidate's personal values and work style align with your organization's culture and mission? This alignment can significantly impact their job satisfaction, productivity, and longevity with your company.

4. Emotional Intelligence (EQ)

‍Self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills are crucial for effective collaboration and leadership. High EQ often translates to better team dynamics and customer relationships.

5. Problem-Solving Approach

‍How a candidate approaches complex problems can reveal more about their potential than their current skill set. Look for creative thinking, analytical skills, and the ability to break down complex issues.6. Resilience and GritThe capacity to persist in the face of challenges and bounce back from setbacks is a strong indicator of long-term success. This trait often separates high performers from the rest.

7. Potential for Growth

‍Assessing a candidate's capacity and desire for development can be more valuable than their current skills. Look for curiosity, eagerness to learn, and a history of personal and professional growth.

8. Collaboration and Teamwork Skills

‍The ability to work effectively with others and contribute to a positive team dynamic is crucial in most modern workplaces. These skills often determine how well a person can apply their individual abilities within a team context.

9. Alignment with Future Organizational Needs

‍Consider how well a candidate's potential aligns with where your organization is heading, not just where it is now. This forward-thinking approach can help future-proof your workforce.

10. Diversity of Thought and Experience

‍A candidate's unique perspectives can bring valuable diversity to problem-solving and innovation within the organization. This diversity often leads to more creative solutions and better decision-making.

Moving Beyond the Resume

‍Does this mean we should toss resumes out the window? Not necessarily. They can still provide useful context about a candidate's journey. However, they shouldn't be the primary factor in hiring decisions.Instead, we need to develop more holistic assessment methods that take into account the factors listed above. This might involve:

• Structured interviews that probe for adaptability, problem-solving skills, and cultural fit
• Psychometric assessments to understand a candidate's innate drivers and potential
• Job auditions or simulations to see how candidates perform in real-world scenarios
• Reference checks that focus on a candidate's soft skills and ability to learn and grow

Conclusion

‍It's time to move beyond the resume and rethink what truly matters in hiring. By focusing on factors like innate drivers, adaptability, and cultural fit, we can make better hiring decisions. This approach not only leads to more successful hires but also opens doors for candidates who might have been overlooked in a traditional resume-centric process.The future of hiring isn't about finding the person with the perfect list of skills and experiences. It's about finding individuals with the right potential, drive, and alignment with your organization's values and goals. By prioritizing these ten factors over traditional skills and experience, you'll be well on your way to building a more dynamic, adaptable, and successful workforce.